“I don't want to get to the end of my life
and find that I lived just the length of it.
I want to have lived the width of it as well.”
~ Diane Ackerman
“See your body as a trusted and treasured home for yourself to enjoy and use fully,
rather than as an aesthetic object.” ~Susan Kano

Are you a “checker?” Do you constantly “check” your body to see if you look okay? For any sign of weight change? To see if your hair, make-up and clothes are perfect? To see if you are okay? Constantly scrutinizing yourself can contribute to negative body image, which is a guaranteed path to unhappiness.

What is Negative or Distorted Body Image?

Body image is your perception of how you see yourself. It does not have to be based in reality. When the way you see yourself is not accurate, you have a distorted body image (or “negative body image”). Like with eating disorders, it is more common in women, but many men also have an unrealistic body image.

Body image consists of how you see your own body’s attractiveness, health, acceptability, and functionality, starting way back in early childhood. This body image continues to form as you age, and see images of others on the web, TV and movies, and as you receive feedback from peers, family member, coaches, etc.

If you are perfectionistic, or self-critical, you have a much greater chance of developing a negative internalized image of your body.

Signs & Symptoms of Negative Body Image

Symptoms of unhealthy or negative body image may include:

Obsessively scrutinizing your body by looking in mirrors and other forms of body checking
Thinking disparaging comments about your body and it’s shape
Frequent comparison of your body, including shape and size, to other people
Monitoring and feeling jealous over a friend’s body, or someone walking down the street, or someone in the media
Believing that media images are real and comparing yourself to these not real images

What is Body Checking?

Have you ever caught yourself repeatedly checking parts of your body? This is "body checking," a form of self-monitoring that often occurs with people who diet, who try to change their body shape, and with those who struggle with eating disorders.

There are various forms of body checking, you may be engaging in it without even realizing it. For example:

Do you pinch your abdomen?
Or rub your belly looking for hip bones? Or other parts of your body looking for other bones?
Do you “measure’ parts of your body with your hand (for instance, wrap one had around the other wrist to see if it is bigger or smaller?)
Are you constantly weighing yourself each day?
Do you zero in on specific body parts in the mirror?
Do you ask friends or family members’ opinions about your body?
And how often do you compare yourself to an image in a magazine, or a movie star, or to the person next to you?

You may body check hundreds of times in one day without even realizing it. And each time you do, it can impact how you feel about your body shape and weight, most often negatively.

Compulsive Body Checking

For some, body checking feels like a compulsion, like you can’t stop.

You may check your body to reassure yourself that you have not gained weight since last eating. Or, without realizing it, you may be “measuring” your upper arm as a distraction from uncomfortable emotions, for instance, during a family fight. Or you may be feeling fat, and want to reassure yourself that you are okay.

Ultimately, body checking is an attempt to feel better about yourself. And you may feel a sense of relief at doing so, but it is never lasting, so you have to check again. And then there are the times you don’t feel you measure up, so you have to check again, or find something else to check.

And what are you looking for? The problems, right? You hope they aren’t there, but think they are so you have to check. You are looking for the negative, which will lead to increased dissatisfaction and greater feelings of loss of control over shape and weight. It may also lead to increased anxiety and depression.

It can also contribute to the development of an eating disorder or keep you stuck in one, because these behaviors keep you focused on shape and weight. And this type of focus is a primary mechanism that maintains anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, and other eating disorders in both men and women.

Why Does Body Checking Lead to Negative Body Image?

“Checking” yourself means you are looking for, indeed seeking out, flaws and problems, whether real or perceived. Doing so has the impact of magnifying whatever is there, again whether real or perceived.

You are actually teaching yourself to automatically look for and find problems. And you are probably smart, and learn well. This means that eventually you will become very good at finding the “problems,” problems that everyone has and that are normal, but you don’t see them that way.

It will get to the point were the “flaws” become the only thing you see when you look at yourself.

Another Problem with Body Checking

Checking can also cause you to miss out on life. Do you hold yourself back because your body does not measure up? Do you avoid participating in certain aspects of life, waiting for the day your body passes the “check” test? Have you missed activities—like swimming—because you did not like the way you looked in the necessary outfit?

Tips to Reduce Body Checking and Overcome Body Image Issues

Addressing body checking can have a powerful positive impact on your body image, and can actually decrease shape and weight concerns, helping you feel more comfortable in your body.

“What would you be noticing or experiencing in life if you were not checking?”

Reducing body checking can also help facilitate recovery from eating disorders because improving body image is a critical component in recovery from anorexia, builima and binge eating disorder, in fact, any emotional eating disorder. The opposite is also true: Not address body checking behaviors can negatively impact recovery.

Body Checking Tip #1: Become Aware of Your Body Checking

In order to interrupt body checking, you must first become aware of the behavior. For just one day, decide to notice every time you “check” yourself (on the scale, in the mirror, by asking others’ opinions). Notice your self-talk and whether it is helpful or hurtful. You may want to keep a journal and jot down the time and what you did.

Try to be as nonjudgemental with yourself as you can. If you catch yourself beating yourself up as you try to increase your awareness, use such phrases as, “Oh, wow, this is interesting, I had no idea I was body checking so much. Fascinating. I hope to use this information to help me feel better about myself. It’s taken me a long time to develop these behaviors, and it will take some time to heal. I will be gentle with myself.”

Body Checking Tip #2: Explore What May Be Driving Your Body Checking

Eyes that see beauty, nose that smells the salt air and legs that got you up on that lifeguard station!

As you become aware of how often and when you're body checking, you may want to discover why you are doing this behavior, what is behind it. Since the point of body checking is to hide problems and concerns away from your conscious mind, this can be a challenging task. Don’t hesitate to discuss your experiences with a therapist or registered dietitian who specializes in eating issues. Or with a trusted friend who has done her/his own body image work.

When you notice body checking, ask yourself:

Hypothetically, if body checking really meant I was avoiding some underlying issue, what in the world might I be avoiding at this moment.

The give yourself a bit of time to look around at what is going on in your life. Nothing? Then go back 10 minutes, what happened in the last 10 minutes? Nothing? Then go back an hour, what happened in the past hour? Etc.

With practice, you will begin see the distressing things in your life that body checking distracts you from. Make sure to get support when you begin to discover these concerns. The good news is, you can only begin addressing them once you find them.

Body Checking Tip #3: What Am I Doing?

In this activity, you will be taking a hard look at what you are actually doing. As you ask yourself the following questions, you will begin to see the futility of the behavior. But you have to be honest with yourself.

When you catch yourself body checking, ask:

What, exactly am I looking for right now? Listen for the response.
Is this helpful to me and my life?
How much time is this behavior taking up in my life, and what would I be doing if I wasn’t checking?

Then say to yourself either:

“This is exactly how I want to be spending my time,” and see how that feels, or say to yourself,
“This is not how I want to be spending my time, I would rather be _________, so I’m going to go do that now.” See how that feels. And if you can’t do that other thing, say to yourself,
“This is not how I want to be spending my time, I would rather be _________, but since I can’t do that right now, I am going to _________. And then do that. And see how it feels.

Notice which of the above 3 comments honestly feels the best.

As you continue to examine the body checking behaviors regularly, you will likely notice you are doing them less over time.

Body Checking Tip #4: Body Image Work - Function Over Form

Each time you notice your body checking, counteract that by noticing and appreciating something your body has done for you within the preceding hour, no matter how seemingly inconsequential.

Grateful for you body that gets you to your car and your hands that open the door

For instance, you “check” to see if your stomach looks flat. Immediately think back and say, “I appreciate that my body got me from my front door to my car.” Notice how this seemingly minor event is really not so minor when you notice and appreciate it!

Allow yourself to, however briefly, view your body as a trusted and treasured home that you appreciate and use fully. Focus on the function of it, rather than the form (what it looks like, etc).

Here is a list of functions you can appreciate to pull you away from critical body checking:

I’m so glad I have eyes and can see the sky and trees and birds.
I love that my hand can grasp this water bottle so easily.
I’m grateful that I can walk to the store and don’t need assistance.
I really do enjoy smelling the salt air, I’m glad my sniffer works so well.
I appreciate my arms because they help me bring in the groceries (oh, and they also carried my suitcase around when I was in Europe!).
And one large woman doing this exercise finally realized: “My grandson loves to sit on my big lap and cuddle up with me. I’m thankful to have a place for him to feel so safe.” And that brought tears of joy to her eyes!

A Word of Hope from Eating Wisdom

Body checking does not need to be a way of life. You can break away from these patterns and develop a positive body image. Doing this will have a powerful impact on your life in many ways, helping you heal food obsessions and eating disorders, but also simply freeing up your time to enjoy life more fully.

If you need support in healing body image issues, do not hesitate to reach out to a professional. Sometimes a bit of guidance is all we need!