When you’ve spent years at war with your body, it can be hard to imagine another way. We're often told that disliking ourselves is the necessary fuel for change—that only by being critical enough, strict enough, or fed up enough will we finally shape up, tone up, or slim down.

But what if that’s never been true?

What if the real path to well-being starts not with harshness, but with kindness? Not with self-loathing, but with self-respect?

Caring for something tends to go hand-in-hand with appreciating it. And your body—imperfect, resilient, and endlessly loyal—deserves that care.

Yet most of us are afraid that if we accept our bodies, we would become complacent, even lazy, and never reach our goals. The prevailing notion is that we have to hate ourselves enough to change. Even Jean Nidetch, founder of Weight Watchers, has said that women need to loathe themselves enough before they will do something about themselves.

No wonder we are constantly body checking!

Is the Idea of Body Acceptance Intimidating?

For many people, it is—and that’s completely understandable.

The idea of accepting your body, especially in a world steeped in diet culture, can feel not just uncomfortable, but impossible. We’ve been handed such rigid and narrow ideas about what bodies are supposed to look like—about size, shape, ability, even how our bodies should express gender. No wonder acceptance feels like such a stretch.

And while there’s growing conversation around appreciating all bodies, you don’t have to leap all the way to love or full acceptance right away. Sometimes, the next best step is body neutrality—where you’re not praising your body, but you’re also not rejecting it. You’re simply allowing it to be.

That shift alone can quiet some of the harsh self-talk. It can make space for a bit more kindness. And when you’re not busy battling your body, it becomes easier to care for it.

If you’re stuck in cycles of body criticism or feeling overwhelmed by the negative thoughts, you’re not alone—and you don’t have to figure it out by yourself. Reach out. We’d love to chat about how you can begin to feel more at ease in your own skin.

What Does Body Acceptance Really Mean?

Body and self acceptance doesn’t mean you love everything about yourself, or that you’ve reached some final destination of confidence. It simply means recognizing that you—and your body—are good enough as you are. Right now. For now.

Being in the body acceptance camp means you’ve started to see how self-criticism does more harm than good. You’ve noticed that being hard on yourself:

Can take a toll on both your mental and physical wellbeing.
Can lead to or worsen disordered eating.
Can pull you away from fully living your life.

And you don’t want that anymore.

Self-acceptance is for all bodies—fat bodies, thin bodies, somewhere-in-between bodies. But to truly feel at peace in your own skin, you also have to recognize and challenge fatphobia—both around you and within you. Because when the world teaches you to see some bodies as “less than,” it becomes that much harder to accept your own.

The articles below offer new ways to see, think, and feel—starting points for cultivating more compassion toward your body, and yourself.

Enjoy Some Body Positive Vibes

Below, you’ll find a list of resources to help you explore a different way: one rooted in body compassion, body appreciation, and a gentler relationship with yourself. You don’t have to love everything about your body to start treating it like it matters. Sometimes, just beginning to notice the good it does is enough to shift everything.

This Is Who I Am: Our Beauty In All Shapes and Sizes - Beautiful book with elegant nude photos of women of diverse size, shape and age. Each woman shares her personal struggles with body image. The strength of these women shine through in every frame.

A Fat Rant - We love this video! Go Joy Nash!!!!
Fat Rant 2 - Another video showing compulsive behaviors, also by Joy Nash.
Fat Rant 3 - How do you respond if someone comments on your size?
Totally Awesome - Appreciating diverse beauty.
Big Girl (You Are Beautiful) - Fun music video by Mika.

Commenting on Weight Loss Isn’t the Compliment You Think It Is - I don't believe that complimenting someone for taking up less space in the world is a compliment.

Losing the Weight Stigma - Argues that you can’t assume someone is unhealthy just because she’s fat, any more than you can assume someone is healthy just because she’s slim. Rather, they say, we should focus on health measurements that are more meaningful than numbers on a scale.

Joy Nash and Kelly Bliss Go Up Against MeMe Roth (of the National Action Against Obesity) - I'm glad I wasn't on that show, MeMe (whose name says a lot ...memememe) would not have survived! Part 2. If you think ol' MeMe makes sense, go to Fatness and Health.

BMI: Freaking Out About Nothing - Note comments on ht/wt at the upper right. Can you use this slide show to discuss how insane the government weight standards are?