There are two forms of eating that can feel out-of-control: deprivation-driven eating and emotional eating. Most people think that out-of-control eating is mostly emotional. Actually, it is far more likely that ‘over’eating is deprivation-driven.

Our culture encourages us to believe that if we get enough, we will be enough. So we keep trying to get more-- more love, more attention, more success, more weight loss. But it never seems to be enough to make us feel better.

You want to feel better, and every weight loss ad promises you will feel better, and be happy, when you lose weight. And you probably do feel happier when you start your new eating program. But when you’ve lost your resolve, the good feelings go away, so you figure if you just lost a bit more weight, you’d feel better. But then it goes away yet again! How can you sustain that “better” feeling?

The “change your body” approach to joy and happiness fosters the very disconnection that is causing the distress. The combination of connection and gratitude is the key to feeling happy and joyful. Here's why.